You know you’re desperate when you go the dentist and treat it like a social engagement and leave there thinking you had a great time.  The dental hygienist hung out with me at the checkout counter and said, it’s been fun. Yes it has, I say.  Too bad I only get to go every six months. AND I am in LOVE with my new dentist.  At first I had that feeling like oh no, I’ve been with my old dentist for 25 years and who HWH-Dentistcan be as nice as him. Then in walks Dr. G. for Gorgeous with dreamy camel eyes and spiked hair. I have an affinity for unruly hair.  AND the gentlest touch…the way he lifted out my cheeks and peeked inside. Ahhh….All of his patients must swoon.  I tell you, I’ve had the kindest, gentlest male DOCs lately.  Where have they been all of my life?

You know you’re desperate when you are walking the dog and you see a spent condom in the parking lot and your first reaction is, EEEWWW, that’s gross….. And your second is jealousy.

I did have my cardiologist appointment this week.  At work we are on this computerized system where everyone knows where you are and what you are doing. They can even read your case notes.  The others mark out personal time – dentist or OB-GYN or whatever.  That is a little too much info for me.  Like I am going to say, personal time – CARDIOLOGIST. I purposely made my appointment with a female cardiologist.  I’m waiting patiently for her, half naked, and in walks this big burly, balding young man with designer glasses. Huh? I’m thinking the Doc’s name could have been a man’s name but I’m sure he’s supposed to be a she. This again.  He sees the panic in my eyes and starts explaining really fast that he is a resident on rotation and from the family clinic. He takes a complete and very thorough history. He is really listening to me.  Then he says he will go and get the doctor.  I decide to meditate and use my time wisely. The door opens and in walks yet another older man, followed by the big, burly teddy bear and THEN my female cardiologist.  The older man, my age, is wearing braces. Somehow that seems to equal out that I am half naked.  He asks me pertinent questions and each of them take several turns listening to my heart and have teaching moments together. My only mortification is that I had to lift my breast for each of them in turn.  Shit. I just hate that.  It couldn’t have been too bad. The young DOC wants me to become his patient at the clinic since he knows my history and all. AND has seen me naked. Where’s the dignity. The female doctor didn’t say a word. She stood there with her arms crossed and looked at the floor. She is supposed to be a “fellow.”  AND when she listened to my heart, she would take a deep breath, close her eyes and go inward.  Like she was intuitively listening and she was right on each time. I LOVED it.  As soon as the guys left, she talked away and gave me her email. I did email her later and she responded within the hour.  They all could hear what seemed like important things with my heart.  They remained calm which made me feel calm and are not jumping to conclusions. They are redoing the echocardiogram in a couple of weeks. I’m good with that and feel very, very hopeful.  I do think I should wait to learn scuba diving though.  I’d hate to be 50 feet under and have one of my episodes.

So my parents visited over the weekend.  While it was nice to have company, it was also very stressful. My mom lives life on a thirty second delay. I say, gee, look at the hyacinths blooming and thirty seconds later there is this little echo saying, oh, look at the hyacinths blooming.  My dad is always an accident waiting to happen. As in, if he offers to help, try not to accept. You’ll be worse off than when you started. We decide to visit a seaside town after having the big Cracker Barrel breakfast. I stop along the way at the rest stop. My mom says, no, she doesn’t have to go.  We get to the town which turns out to be not a town but a few restaurants and a lot of sail boats. We get out and walk. My mom never mentions needing to go to the bathroom. We get in the car and thirty seconds out of town she says she needs to go.  My dad says, I think if we cross over this bridge there will be a town on the other side we can walk around in and your mother can go to the bathroom. Instinctively I know it’s not going to happen. Plus my dad suggested it which makes it really not going to happen. We go anyway. I plug in the Garmin (the GPS system). When I go to these towns and don’t know where I’m going, I try and pick a street I think will be along the water. I pick Beach Road.  We head into more and more of nothing and end up along the water. We follow Beach Road which turns into not much of a road but it is scenic.  We keep going until the road dead ends at which point Missy Garmin says, You have arrived at your destination. I look up and there at the end of the road, a dead end at that, with nothing else in sight, is a PORT O’POTTY! I kid you not!  Ok, who out there thinks I totally manifested that with my thoughts??  Now I’m working on summers off.

Today I got brave and invited the staff out to lunch. Five of us went and had a good time.  They seemed to warm up to me a little bit.  I found out Senior Stateswoman, who works next to me, is 65 and the other female counselor is 28. My boss is 40. If SS leaves, I become the Senior. There’s an ego booster.

Ok, I think that’s all from my end.

I think of you all often and send love and blessings. Thank you my Angels for always calling at the right time with the right words or emailing the right message or sending the perfect card.

Love to you, Be well, and

Goodnight from Greenville, Dyanne

P.S. – Darling Daughter is coming in the morning. Yay!

Dyanne is an inner wisdom coach, psychotherapist, writer, mind-body healer, Integrative Yoga Therapy teacher, certified “Journal-to-the SELF” instructor and creator of https://www.holywhollyholey.comhelping women heal and step into their power. She is the author of the ebook, “Holey Path to Holy Living: A Women’s Path to Healing and Freeing Sacred Feminine Power,” which can be found on Amazon and on her website


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