by Dyanne Kelley June 5, 2018
We’re women. That implies feminine. Okay, good there. So how do Sacred and Power anchor our core Feminine selves? Being Sacred and Powerful is not woowoo, it’s not about being holier than or better than or even about being holy at all. It’s about honoring and valuing our authentic selves.
Close your eyes and think about what it means to be a woman. Write down five values you hold and five other things you like about yourself, your strengths. Now write down five characteristics you admire in other women. If I collected all of your answers, I imagine they would be very broadly similar. Integrity, Strength, Courage, Wisdom, Creativity and Loving Kindness jump right to the top of the list for me. As women we tend to value all relationships, friends, family, lovers, colleagues, above all else; we use gut instincts, intuition and wisdom in making decisions; we seek meaningful purposeful lives; we speak our truth from the heart; we collaborate, we tend toward kindness and like peace and harmony, we are compassionate, forgiving and caring; and yes, we are even warriors at times protecting mother earth, family and home, Goddesses fighting for fairness, justice and freedom.
Now define what power means to you. Write power in the center of a blank piece of paper, circle it and free associate from there. Draw lines from the circle and write down whatever comes into your mind. Do this quickly without thinking. You should be done in two-three minutes. As soon as you pause and start using your thoughts, stop. In my workshops I often start by asking women this question mostly to let them know where their true power lies. Women tell me their power is in their connections to each other, family and to Spirit, in the love they feel for humanity, in loving what they do and in knowing themselves, an inner awareness.
Sacred Feminine Power then is knowing, loving and valuing who we truly
are from the inside out, not the other way around.
It’s not about who we think we should be, or who others think we should be. We sometimes minimize these strengths as being less than or unimportant. We adopt other inauthentic ways of being and start to value the wrong things like looking perfect, being the right weight, swallowing our emotions, never being angry.
There is no greater power than when we are authentically who we really are, when we honor and trust our very being. Go back to the lists just created. If our work, our way of being in relationships, our goals, if how we are reacting and behaving, and in general, our way of living does not match what we value, admire and who we really are on the inside, then we are not being genuine, true to ourselves. We lose our power. It’s just siphoned off and given away. We are not in love with who we are, our core essence. Instead we chase an illusionary version of ourselves one that cannot truly be attained, a false idea that it will bring us happiness and love. We swallow our truth not wanting to make waves, or fear our own power. We become afraid of losing a relationship if we honor ourselves. Women worry all the time about being selfish. Selfish isn’t taking care of your own needs. It’s totally disregarding the needs of others and thinking only of yourself. Big difference.
There’s a cost to ignoring our Sacred Feminine Power.
Our bodies know the truth and are excellent at telling us we are living inauthentically. All those headaches, stomach aches, and sleepless nights are telling us something. We attract others who do not match our core values creating unhealthy relationships. We hide our emotions and live a pretend life. We try to please and make others happy while ignoring our own happiness. This is where we sometimes need help in figuring out why we are making the choices that keep us from being true to ourselves. Often it involves healing from past wounds and hurts and forgiving ourselves and others. Emotional and spiritual work needs to be done before we can with confidence and love step into who we really, really are. The only way is through, no going around it.
The end result is complete freedom to live the life you are meant to live. The reward is self-love. She slips in through the back door when we become authentic, and plants herself right in the center of our kitchen, the heart space of our being. It’s from this point of strength where we live our best life, where soul potential ignites.
Sacred Feminine Power. Love it. Be it. Live it.
Copyright © 2018 Soulfire Woman, All Rights Reserved
As a Soulfire Woman writer, speaker, coach, psychotherapist, and with a dash of midlife humor, Dyanne connects you to the deepest, wisest part of yourself for lasting change, to your own true nature, your sacred feminine power. She is the blog author of “Confessions from the Other Side…of 50,” “Soulfire Woman Power,” and “My Traveling Midlife Misadventures.” She is also the creator of the ebook “The Holey Path to Holy Living: A Woman’s Path to Healing and Freeing Sacred Feminine Power.”